Goodnight my someone

January 26, 2009 § 2 Comments

The hardest part of breaking up, for me, is saying goodnight.

For a year and a half, I have said goodnight to my someone each night before I went to bed.  Most of those nights I was across an ocean, across five time zones.  I texted goodnight from hostels in at least five countries.  I texted goodnight, I emailed goodnight, I called if I could.  On those few, but wonderful nights, I actually whispered goodnight.

But my someone isn’t really mine anymore, and I suppose it is no longer appropriate to text him goodnight.

I keep thinking of the song “Goodnight My Someone” from the Music Man.  My mother used to sing it to me when I was a baby.

“Goodnight, my someone, Goodnight, my love.”

I love this song for many reasons, and I find it comforting on a couple of levels.

“True love can be whispered from heart to heart, when lovers are parted, they say.”   Even though we have decided we shouldn’t be together, we are still lovers in that we still love each other.  I can hope that our hearts can continue to whisper even though our lips no longer can.

This song is also comforting because it is hopeful.  My true love is out there, I just don’t know who he is yet.  And for now, I can say goodnight to my someone, wherever he is.

I am not entirely ready to devote myself to a new someone, and I still long to say goodnight to my old someone.  So, with this song, I say goodnight to my someone, who I miss dearly, and also hope for a new someone to say goodnight to.

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§ 2 Responses to Goodnight my someone

  • Robin G says:

    Time heals all wounds. (Well, time and fucking other people, if you listen to Dan Savage.) While I don’t necessarily recommend that in its entirety, getting out and going through the motions of a little meaningless flirting will really help you get back on the horse. (It’s also, for the record, how I met The Wookiee.)

  • Rachel says:

    It really is a beautiful song.

    That’s an extremely difficult part about breaking up…not only is a person no longer in your life, but you lose that communication. Emptiness…it’s awful.

    I wish I had powerful advice to offer, but in those situations, the only thing I could do was keep myself occupied.

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